Real Wedding Inspiration

Bridesmaids 101October 6, 2011

Hi y’all! How are you this Thursday? It’s Lisa, and I’m here to talk about something that is so close to my heart right now. At the very moment you’re reading this, I’m on my way to my beautiful home state of Virginia to be a bridesmaid at my best friend (since 1993!)’s wedding! We’ve been dreaming about this day for years, and I can’t believe it’s finally here!

Since she lives in Virginia and I live in Texas, I was a “long distance” bridesmaid for the duration of the wedding planning. While we do have a wedding planning facebook thread that’s 400+ messages long (no joke!), I still felt bad sometimes that I couldn’t do things like go to her bridal shower, help with DIYs, or do any of the things bridesmaids typically do. I did my best to help when I could, but it was definitely tricky! In light of this, I thought that today, I’d compile a list of bridal opinions on what really makes a particularly wonderful/not-so-wonderful bridesmaid. Thanks to all who responded on twitter and facebook!

A great bridesmaid…

-is sugar, spice, and everything nice :)
-gets the bride pumped for her big day.
-is honest about her budget and her other commitments.
-offers to help…and then follows through with it.
-always makes sure the bride has time to have fun preparing for the wedding.
-notices and acknowledges the hard work the bride puts into things.
-takes charge and helps get stuff done when things get the most stressful.
-knows the bride better than anyone, and approves wholeheartedly of the man she’s about to marry.

A not-so-good bridesmaid…
(please note that the picture above is just a beautiful bridal party shot, NOT remotely an example of not-so-good bridesmaids!!)

-is outwardly unsupportive of the bride’s choices, instead of offering other suggestions or trying to help.
-thinks the wedding is just an opportunity to dress up and get pictures taken.
– thinks up “other options” with the other bridesmaids without consulting the bride (regarding things like the dress, for example), making the bride feel left out and hurt.
-forgets how special and personal this time in the bride’s life is, and treats it nonchalantly.

 And a few ideas from me about how to be a long distance bridesmaid! These are just from my experience, of course, but it was really nice to be able to do the following:

-Try to see the bride at least once during her engagement. I was so lucky that my best friend scored a cheap flight to visit me, my sister, and another long distance bridesmaid, so that we could all experience being with her while she tried on wedding dresses! Definitely one of my best memories. We also finally got to look at her engagement ring in person and jump/squeal with excitement, which is just not the same over the phone! :)
-Figure out ways you can be helpful from afar. Even though I couldn’t be there to address save the dates, I did look up a heck of a lot of wine-colored heels online when she had trouble finding some. It meant a lot to be able to help in any small way that I could.
-Send an awesome gift to her bridal shower, wrapped and packaged beautifully, complete with a handwritten card. It can’t hurt, right? ;)
-Take pictures of all the wedding-related things you do. My sister is in the wedding as well, and we took a bajillion pictures of ourselves going out to get our bridesmaid dresses so we could share them with her. I’ll also be photo documenting my trip to Virginia today!

Alright, your turn! What do you think makes an amazing or not-so-great bridesmaid? Have you ever been a bridesmaid in a special situation? I’m sure y’all have some fun stories up your sleeves!

Have an amazing week!



Pictures credits: Green Wedding Shoes, Style Me Pretty, Green Wedding Shoes, Style Me PrettyStyle Me Pretty



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