One thing I’ve learned about myself, especially so throughout this year as I’ve faced multiple big professional and personal transitions, is despite my best efforts I still struggle with failing short of perfect. How silly to so often feel paralyzed by being less than when I’m wise enough to know I’ll never be perfect.
So in an effort to inspire fellow perfectionists out there, or perhaps as a way to gently remind myself that trying my best regardless of the outcome is plenty enough, here’s a list I’ve compiled of ways to be an imperfectionist.
Surround yourself with people who embrace their own shortcomings and flaws. When you see others leaning into their imperfect (whether perceived on their own or otherwise) qualities with confidence and joy, it’s easier to do that same thing yourself. Some of my favorite people to be around are not perfect but in fact very much aware of being the opposite, and that’s inspiring and grounding for me.
Have an open mindset. A lot of times when I find myself falling short of perfection, it’s a spark that ignites a negative fire I have a hard time putting out. For example, I can make a silly soap mistake and instead of looking at the slip up as a chance to learn and grow, I start rattling off how I’m terrible at everything, how unimportant soap is in the world, what a waste of time my efforts were, and so on. Talk about beating myself up and starting a negative internal verbal fight! An open mindset can totally change the direction of your inner dialogue and have a profound impact on how you view yourself and actions; imperfections and all.
Take inventory of your imperfections from every angle (literally and metaphorically, it’s up to you) and get honest with yourself. Falling short of perfection allows us to come face to face with our weaknesses and sometimes, our greatest fears. But perhaps this isn’t a bad thing. Maybe this is just the way we best learn, grow, evolve, and become who we are meant to be, in learning more about who we are not. I’ve uncovered a lot this year about what it means to be an imperfect woman, and while it’s felt ugly, it’s also felt really liberating.
Instead of trying to be perfect all the time, try to be perfect at just doing your best. My need for perfection never serves me well when I’m with my children being their mom. It also leaves me feeling discontent when I strive to have a perfect home. I get easily defeated when I work hard to make my business perfect. When I try to look or act or sound perfect, I get exhausted. All because I always fall short! So instead, I try to simply be perfect at doing my best with the expectation that regardless of the outcome, I’m enough.
As always, take care of yourselves and guard your hearts, friends! Xo